In today’s episode I explore one of the great inconvenient truths about the nature of existence itself. It’s the fact that if we are not moving forward then there is a very good chance we are going backward.
I share a great quote from Dale Carnegie who reminds us that it does not matter how small our steps may be as long as they are heading in the right direction.
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Transcript
Well, Hey everybody, Jonathan Doyle with you.
Speaker:Once again, welcome back frightful friends to the daily podcast.
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Speaker:across a link across to that.
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Speaker:You want to, I do a, a free offer where you can get free access
Speaker:to my book, bridging the gap.
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Speaker:into the show notes today.
Speaker:Grab yourself a copy.
Speaker:I have had a good day.
Speaker:Uh, caught up with similarly great people.
Speaker:I always try and keep pushing myself.
Speaker:To be around.
Speaker:good people who can help me to grow now today.
Speaker:My friend, we are going to talk about a quote from Dale Carnegie.
Speaker:I've been, uh, over the last few weeks and months, we've been looking at all of the
Speaker:great men and women throughout history.
Speaker:We've talked about Marcus Aurelius a fair bit.
Speaker:Yesterday was one of my favorites, Zig Ziegler, talking about how we manage
Speaker:our past, our present and our future.
Speaker:So today we're going to talk about Dale Carnegie.
Speaker:One of the great.
Speaker:I guess motivational, uh, character based writers of the early 20th century.
Speaker:So I really liked this quote, listen to this.
Speaker:He says, if you are not in the process of becoming the person you want to be.
Speaker:You are automatically engaged in becoming.
Speaker:That is gold.
Speaker:Listen to that again.
Speaker:If you're not in the process of becoming the person you want to be, you're
Speaker:automatically engaged and becoming the person you don't want to be.
Speaker:This is a thesis.
Speaker:That I have been a guest sharing with you guys for a very long time.
Speaker:It's around homeostasis or homeostasis, depending on how you want to pronounce it.
Speaker:Homeostasis is the principle that objects are trying to stay
Speaker:in equilibrium at all times.
Speaker:Now, one of the ways to think about it is.
Speaker:Your own internal physiological system, your neurochemical,
Speaker:biological internal system, you know, your blood pressure, heart rate.
Speaker:Hormone levels there.
Speaker:They're always trying to seek balance.
Speaker:Yes, they do vary at different times of the day.
Speaker:They vary when we eat when we sleep.
Speaker:But in general, this principle of homeostasis means that the body is
Speaker:trying to keep itself in the optimal.
Speaker:Uh, state, I guess, of equilibrium for as long as possible.
Speaker:And of course, when we knock things out of equilibrium, we get all sorts of problems.
Speaker:But here is the interesting paradox.
Speaker:The cosmos itself.
Speaker:Is not holding itself in homeostasis.
Speaker:It's constantly moving and growing and expanding there.
Speaker:Stay with me as I put all this together.
Speaker:So even our own bodies, you know, from the second of conception.
Speaker:We're moving towards a different state.
Speaker:We're moving here.
Speaker:I can't believe I'm going to say this on a motivational podcast.
Speaker:We're moving towards physical death.
Speaker:I don't believe it's a spiritual, I think it's a physical death.
Speaker:Um, so even, even if, even though we have homeostasis taking place,
Speaker:In the interview, if you put the lens of a single day over your body, but
Speaker:really what's happening is that we're still growing and moving forward, we're
Speaker:still developing towards something.
Speaker:And of course, as I've said recently, if you look at the big bang theory,
Speaker:the thesis of the singularity as they call it, when the cosmos came
Speaker:into existence, it's still moving.
Speaker:It's still growing.
Speaker:It's still a dynamic process everywhere around you, that you look is growth
Speaker:and change, growth and change.
Speaker:It's everywhere.
Speaker:It's in the plants that you look at at your window.
Speaker:It's in your own physical body, it's in your kids or your friends.
Speaker:You're seeing it everywhere.
Speaker:The world, the clouds, the sky, the ocean, the air, everything is
Speaker:in a constant state of movement.
Speaker:And that's why I like what Dale Carnegie is getting at here.
Speaker:He says, if you're not in the process,
Speaker:Of becoming the person you want to be moving towards that internalized ideal.
Speaker:Then he says you're not staying neutral.
Speaker:And he says, even if we think that we're just staying exactly where we are, he
Speaker:says effectively, we're going backwards.
Speaker:We're becoming the person.
Speaker:We don't want it to be.
Speaker:So you know that if you sit on the couch of life and do nothing, you don't improve.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:You.
Speaker:You basically go backwards.
Speaker:You don't stay exactly the same.
Speaker:Like, if you sat on the couch, literally let's say literal physical couch.
Speaker:For extended periods of time.
Speaker:Got no exercise.
Speaker:Didn't uh, look after your physical appearance, didn't read
Speaker:anything didn't eat properly.
Speaker:You know, you'd like to think that you're just sitting there doing nothing, but
Speaker:you're definitely doing something right.
Speaker:And that something is going to take you backwards.
Speaker:So I like this idea that if we're not in the process of becoming
Speaker:the person that we want to be, we're automatically by default.
Speaker:Engaged in becoming the person that we don't want to be.
Speaker:I think that's powerful.
Speaker:What's the message.
Speaker:We have to be constant.
Speaker:Agents in our own life agents of action agents of change.
Speaker:Now often I get the question.
Speaker:Well, Jonathan, what about, you know, Prayer and stillness and meditation
Speaker:and accepting the way things are and being at peace with that.
Speaker:Totally get it.
Speaker:Totally get it.
Speaker:I do.
Speaker:And as I've said, always, I have plenty of that built into my life.
Speaker:In fact, just before coming into the studio today.
Speaker:I had a busy morning and I took some time out.
Speaker:I finished watching a really interesting documentary.
Speaker:I sat on the couch with our magnificent caboodle Benji, and, uh, and just
Speaker:sat for a bit, had a good coffee.
Speaker:I'm going to just rested.
Speaker:I guess there's definite seasons there's times there's moments where we
Speaker:take stock, where we settle, where we regain a sense of balance and poise.
Speaker:But I think what kind of needs reminding us of is what is the general trajectory?
Speaker:What is the general trajectory?
Speaker:You see tomorrow morning, I'm planning to go out and probably run a marathon.
Speaker:Um, it's not an organized one.
Speaker:I just sometimes go out and run them because I can.
Speaker:And because, cause I'm a little bit different.
Speaker:But, uh, you know, I'll do at least 35 K and if I get to 35, I'll probably
Speaker:just go ahead and do the marathon.
Speaker:Um, I'm 48 and I'm not a built runner.
Speaker:I'm not built to run, but I like this process of just testing myself,
Speaker:pushing myself, encouraging people through some of the things that I do.
Speaker:So with all my imperfections, I'm tracking toward.
Speaker:This ideal of becoming the fullness of what I can become.
Speaker:I'm not going to reach it in this lifetime, but my
Speaker:general trajectory is growth.
Speaker:So if I was to do none of those things, The message of today is that I wouldn't
Speaker:stay the same and actually go backwards.
Speaker:So one more time, listen to Dale Carnegie, give you not in the process.
Speaker:Of becoming the person you want to be, you are automatically engaged in
Speaker:becoming the person you don't want to be.
Speaker:Who is that person you don't want to be?
Speaker:It's the person that doesn't grow.
Speaker:It's the person that looks the same year after year after year and thinks the same
Speaker:thoughts and says the same things and holds all the same opinions and has had
Speaker:all the same experiences with nothing new, no growth coming into the system.
Speaker:You know, we do it without gardens.
Speaker:Don't we?
Speaker:I mean, we're constantly tending to them.
Speaker:Fertilizing them adding things to them, improving them, taking care
Speaker:of them so that they become all that they can be as another metaphor.
Speaker:But we need to be doing that to ourselves as well.
Speaker:So do not take this as an overwhelming chore.
Speaker:Do not take this as some great big burden.
Speaker:The way I want you to think about it is just pick something small.
Speaker:Just pick one thing, whether it's a relationship, whether it's negative
Speaker:thinking whether it's physical fitness, whether it's getting a
Speaker:promotion, just pick something and ask yourself, am I growing?
Speaker:Am I moving forward?
Speaker:What's the trend.
Speaker:What's the trajectory.
Speaker:And then if it's not where you want it to be, take a small step of difference.
Speaker:It doesn't have to be remarket.
Speaker:Markably huge.
Speaker:It's like the snowball at the top of the mountain.
Speaker:Once you start to get a little bit of momentum in your life.
Speaker:One day, you suddenly find you're in new territory.
Speaker:You suddenly find, Hey.
Speaker:My life, different things are different now i'm starting to feel different i can
Speaker:do different things i can have different desires i can approach what the life
Speaker:differently we're here to grow we are here to grow I'm a parent three young
Speaker:kids still and what's one of the greatest joys seeing them grow my son is literally
Speaker:just turning the corner into being a young man i'm actually starting to see the
Speaker:facial changes the physical changes The cognition changes and it's a joy to sink.
Speaker:wonder what he's going to become i wonder what's going to happen here i wonder
Speaker:who's going to turn into And you know it's just i think that's how god looks
Speaker:at us he looks at us are we engaged in the process are we contributing to our
Speaker:own growth Are we learning to love more each year are we more healthier each year
Speaker:are we contributing more each year just that incremental growth that movement
Speaker:forward All right friends that's it for me please make sure you've subscribed
Speaker:to it for me hit that subscribe button Go check out those show notes booked me
Speaker:to speak I'm back on stage terrorizing audiences all over the world And um
Speaker:got a wonderful invite to new orleans this week Looking forward to seeing we
Speaker:could make that happen I've got about 3000 people there in new orleans and
Speaker:i'd love to get there Um to uh respond to that invite and do the keynote.
Speaker:so uh if you'd like me to come and speak live at your event please reach
Speaker:out all the details will be here in the show notes god bless you everybody
Speaker:my name is jonathan doyle this has been the daily message and you and
