We all face problems in life. The issue is whether our dominant strategy is avoidance or confrontation. Within every problem is the chance to master a new possibility for growth. In today’s episode I discuss some insights on the value of our problems from the perspective of the great psychologist Carl Rogers.
Transcript
Well, Hey everybody, Jonathan Doyle with you.
Speaker:Once again.
Speaker:Welcome aboard friends to the daily podcast.
Speaker:Wherever you're listening.
Speaker:Walking running, driving.
Speaker:Hopefully not while operating dangerous machinery.
Speaker:You are.
Speaker:I hope I can bring you something good today.
Speaker:There's just so much wisdom in the world.
Speaker:You know, there's so many great men and women.
Speaker:Who've uh, learned so much and I love bringing you some
Speaker:of these insights each day.
Speaker:You know, I always say we just need one or two good ideas sometimes in life
Speaker:to, um, to push us in a new direction.
Speaker:We just need a little bit of.
Speaker:Encouragement and insight and inspiration.
Speaker:So today I want to share with you another great quote from.
Speaker:The famous psychologist, Carl Rogers.
Speaker:Now I know some of you have been listening on a daily basis and you're
Speaker:like, what is this thing, Jonathan?
Speaker:You've been on a bit of a, uh, He'd been on a bit of a smorgasbord
Speaker:of famous psychologists lately.
Speaker:And I have been, I think there's just so many incredible men and
Speaker:women that have just, you know,
Speaker:Spent their entire lives, thinking about human behavior and what leads
Speaker:to a rich, full, meaningful life.
Speaker:And, uh, I want to bring you some of that.
Speaker:So today I'm going to share with you this quote from Carl
Speaker:Rogers, and I really liked this.
Speaker:He says growth occurs.
Speaker:Let's agree before I give you the rest that we are all
Speaker:interested in growth over here.
Speaker:You ever met somebody that says, you know what?
Speaker:I hate growth.
Speaker:I want to go backwards.
Speaker:So let's start from there.
Speaker:Growth matters to us.
Speaker:He says this growth occurs when individuals.
Speaker:Confront problems.
Speaker:Struggled to master them.
Speaker:And through that struggle.
Speaker:Develop new aspects of their skills, capacities, and views about life.
Speaker:One more time.
Speaker:Growth occurs when individuals confront problems.
Speaker:Struggled to master them.
Speaker:And through that struggle, develop new aspects of their skills.
Speaker:Capacities.
Speaker:And views about life, right.
Speaker:A couple of key points.
Speaker:The word is confront.
Speaker:When individuals confront their problems.
Speaker:So we all have problems, right?
Speaker:So you right now have a problem.
Speaker:And, you know, it was laughed at when Tony Robbins said that the
Speaker:thing about success is that, uh, the more successful you become, what
Speaker:you get is a better kind of problem.
Speaker:You just get different problems.
Speaker:So some people like, well, I'll be happy one day when this happens
Speaker:and I go, no, when you get there, what are you going to have?
Speaker:It's just a different kind of problem.
Speaker:It might be a.
Speaker:You know, a bigger one.
Speaker:It might be more expansive.
Speaker:One.
Speaker:But remember that this journey of life doesn't lead to.
Speaker:The avoidance and disappearance of all challenge and suffering.
Speaker:We just get new challenges and bigger ones if we want to grow.
Speaker:And that's what it means to be human.
Speaker:So we've got to confront these problems.
Speaker:And struggle to master them.
Speaker:So whatever you're facing right now, whatever problem you have in
Speaker:your life, relationship problem.
Speaker:The health problem.
Speaker:A career problem.
Speaker:You got a couple options here.
Speaker:You've got avoidance or confrontation, right?
Speaker:Avoidance or confrontation.
Speaker:Think about the universe is that it doesn't seem to like standing
Speaker:still, you know, you look around you, things are either growing or dying,
Speaker:aren't they, they're not, you know, very people go, no, I could look
Speaker:at the mountains and the mountains.
Speaker:They don't change.
Speaker:Course.
Speaker:They changed it, changing all the time.
Speaker:They used to be bigger.
Speaker:They've been worn down by rain and wind.
Speaker:I guess everything's changing all the time.
Speaker:So our thing with problems is confrontation or avoidance
Speaker:confrontation or avoidance.
Speaker:Now we don't have to burn ourselves out.
Speaker:Full frontal attacking every problem all the time.
Speaker:But we want to have a life where in general, when we become aware of
Speaker:problems in our life that we don't go into denial, we don't want to
Speaker:be on that river in Egypt, denial.
Speaker:We want to be facing things and confronting them and
Speaker:seeking to master them.
Speaker:So what Roger is saying here is that as we go through that
Speaker:struggle, as we do that work of confrontation, instead of avoidance.
Speaker:We end up with a new set of a new aspect about our own skills.
Speaker:And you know, if you've been listening carefully a few days ago,
Speaker:I shared a quote from Albert Bandura.
Speaker:Who said that?
Speaker:That our belief about our capacities has a huge influence on our capacities.
Speaker:So this ties in with what Rogers is saying is that.
Speaker:When you confront something and eventually you master it.
Speaker:It changes your self perception.
Speaker:It changes your self perception because you become aware that, you know what,
Speaker:that was really hard, but I did it and I got better and I grew in the process.
Speaker:So I want to encourage us all today that whatever problem we're facing.
Speaker:It isn't going to go sideways or stay the same.
Speaker:It's either going to get worse or it's going to get better.
Speaker:So if your problem is you hate your career.
Speaker:Well, what do you do about that?
Speaker:Well, you can stay exactly where you are.
Speaker:You can just, uh, you know, but.
Speaker:Ironically, you know, paradoxically, you're not going to stay where you are.
Speaker:Are you going to go slowly backwards?
Speaker:Because you're going to get more resentful.
Speaker:You're going to get more unhappy.
Speaker:So to confront that problem to seek, to master a new set of skills, whether that's
Speaker:interview skills or doing more study or.
Speaker:You know, entering a new area of the economy, whatever it is like it's about
Speaker:either confrontation or avoidance.
Speaker:So I want to encourage us all relationships, health, and fitness.
Speaker:Uh, Korea, the big things that matter in life for spirituality.
Speaker:Love.
Speaker:We don't want to live in that land of avoidance.
Speaker:We want to live in that land of confrontation, mastery, and growth.
Speaker:All right friends.
Speaker:That's it for me, please make sure that you have it subscribed
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Speaker:God bless your friends.
Speaker:My name's Jonathan Doyle.
Speaker:This has been the daily podcast.
Speaker:And i'll have another message for you tomorrow
